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Movie Review : Kuchh Kariye


 
 Kuchh Kariye
Director :
Music :
Starring :
 Jagbir Dahiya
 Onkar
 Sukhwinder Singh, Shriya, Deepak Shirke, Ahmed Khan, Mushtaq Khan, Abhay Bhargav, Suresh Chatwal, Khuahhish and Vikrum Kumar

Kuchh Kariye Movie Review

April 24, 2010 03:17:02 PM IST
By Joginder Tuteja, Bollywood Trade News Network
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KUCHH KARIYE

KUCHH KARIYE

KUCHH KARIYE is a terrible, terrible and a really terrible film. In fact it can easily be confirmed on the records that this is the worst that 2010 had to offer so far. Now ideally a review should end here because readers can pretty much get the gist. But then some movies are so poorly made that they deserve to be slaughtered for what they are. So here we go.

First things first, what was this film all about? Was it about Hindu-Muslim riots? Was it about terrorists? Was it about underworld? Was it about the strugglers in the film industry? Was it about the lectures on 'insaaniyat'? Or was it about a bunch of enemies of Sukhwinder Singh who instigated the singer to come in front of the camera and then silently laughed away from a corner? Let's explore this one by one.

What was this film all about?

Well, the answer is, errr, hmmmm, uhhh, guess what, don't bother!

Was it about Hindu-Muslim riots?

There couldn't have been a poorer way of demonstrating this where 'dharm ke thekedaar' (do they still write dialogues like these?) come together to make Hindus and Muslims fight for their own benefits. 'Breaking news' - did someone say?

Was it about terrorists?

A man in a black hood walks into a film set, mixed up with actors (who are playing terrorists) and as the director calls 'action', he pumps bullets into an entire cast and crew. Wait, there is more. There is also a solitary mention of how 'ameerzaade' are running scared now after 26/11. Yeah, of course!

Was it about underworld?

Ok, don't laugh on this one. Mukesh Tiwari, a self styled 'baadshah khan' kind of character lives in an apartment where a maulvi kinds, a Chandraswami clone and a stray politician wine and dine and make their sinister plans. This apartment doesn't have anyone manning the gates from outside. Instead, there are a couple of bandookdhaaris who answer the door bell (man, an underworld kingpin living in an apartment who has people appointed to answer a doorbell? Can you beat that?). Wait, this is not all. There are also a couple of Russian type angrakshak females that Tiwari has near his throne who stay on as mannequins, right through the film's duration. You have to see the movie just for this very setting and hence an entire para dedicated to this set.

Was it about the strugglers in the film industry?

Now this one is for the trivia happy. Did you know that there was someone called Nandkumar who was offered Dilip Kumar starrer PAIGHAAM, only to be replaced by Rajkumar at the last minute. The same Nandkumar guy became a watchman of the Filmistan studio where the film was launched. Turns out that this Nandkumar died (naturally so) only after he met one of the dozen odd non-actors from KUCHH KARIYE. By the way, this Nandkumar is enacted by Suresh Chatwal whose brilliance as an actor is a known fact for decades!




Was it about the lectures on 'insaaniyat'?

Sukhwinder Singh sings, talks, narrates, debates, argues anything and everything which is about 'neeyat' and 'insaaniyat'. He does it all either under his breath or horribly tuned full throated songs. He is bad in both. And yes, that's an understatement.

Or was it about a bunch of enemies of Sukhwinder Singh who instigated the singer to come in front of the camera and then silently laughed away from a corner?

Yes. Yes. Yes.

Rating - 0/5


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